How to make mistakes needed for school success - Top 3
Each year end and beginning makes me reflect on the year’s wins and losses. If I’m really honest with myself, there isn’t a thing that I’ve tried and failed at miserably later to regret. If anything, those moments that have been spent picking myself up after a failed attempt have further fuelled me to regroup, re-strategise and try again. They have made me more determined, resilient and confident in my skills to land on my feet.
I only wish that I had figured this out at a younger age. I remember feeling paralysed by the fear of looking stupid in front of my secondary school friends. Even though I had the academic scholarship at my school, I thought that I had just been lucky, rather than truly feeling like I deserved it. If the chances of success weren’t above 90%, I would need a lot of encouragement to even try. My competitive streak forced me to be all-or-nothing. I didn’t like the idea of people seeing me be less than proficient at anything, which now as an adult I can see was ridiculous. How are we meant to grow, if we don’t give ourselves the chance to even start? Everyone starts from 0 at some point. What happened to just doing something for the enjoyment of it?
NEED A LITTLE PUSH at SCHOOL?
I really feel for students these days that aren’t afforded the space to experiment in private, due to the age of social media. The pressure to present what you’re doing as a complete product and compare yourself with peers must be stifling. This is why, I’ve made a list of some helpful ways for students to successfully make mistakes.
Go in with the intention not to win
After listening to a podcast - How to Fail by Elizabeth Day, where Deborah Frances White from the Guilty Feminist talks about her stand up amongst many other things (this episode is a must-listen), Deborah’s recommended technique seemed to ring in my ears for days. She told her students at RADA to see auditions as opportunities for data gathering instead of auditions for real jobs. This took the pressure off them so that they could experiment and gain experience. These students could freely figure out what works and doesn’t work for them, whilst sponging up everything that they could learn from the environment. If they got a job, then what an incredible bonus! If it’s our GCSE French class, a football game or a creative writing task, rather than going in with the intention to be the best, why don’t we start by trying to collect information. If we try something and it doesn’t work, it’s ok, because we’re collecting the data in order to improve our craft. We don’t need to be the best; we just need to be learning!
Perfection does not equal success
Name one person who you consider to be successful that didn’t make mistakes. You can’t? That’s because successful people took risks, made mistakes and learnt from them to get to where they are now. They try, they explore, they figure out solutions and grow. We need to get used to the fact that mistakes are part of the journey to success. Whether it’s a class presentation that you stammer through, or the school play during which you forget your lines, you are learning through your mistakes, even though it might feel rough at the time. Just remember that you’re only going to get better with practice. Without the chance to try, you’ll never get better.
Dwelling upon mistakes will diminish your self-confidence. So, bounce back quick!
After you raised your hand and asked a question that your classmates giggled at, or failed the entrance exam for your first-choice school, try to make peace with what didn’t go to plan. First of all, remember that the path to the person you’re meant to become is naturally riddled with mistakes; with errors of judgment; with unforeseen circumstances, and with miscalculated decisions. That is life! The important thing is what you do after the failure. Remind yourself that a mistake doesn’t mean taking two steps back. It means, pivoting to get more clarity on how to move forward. Bounce back and keep putting your hand up to asking questions! Put yourself out there and great things will come.
I hope that these suggestions arm you with the confidence to be brave, take a chance and try something new. Remember, we don’t need to be the best at everything. Sometimes being average or mediocre can be even more fun. Less pressure and self-judgement give us the time we need to grow.